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Shinobi World: I, Kisame Hoshigaki, Refuse to Be Human Anymore! Lin Qinghuai 2969 words 2026-03-06 07:28:29

Moonlight, clear as water, bathed the earth. Under the cover of night, the Hidden Leaf Village remained as lively as ever—brilliantly illuminated, bustling with prosperity.

At daybreak, the Mist ninja would depart and begin their journey back to the Land of Water.

Since returning to the hotel last night, Tongusa Yabito’s face had been clouded with gloom. His beloved dull blade, Kabutowari, had been shattered to pieces by Tsunade with a single punch and kick, leaving only a length of rope behind. Yet, he dared not demand an explanation from Tsunade or the Hidden Leaf.

The humiliation was simply too great.

In the world of shinobi, strength was the ultimate measure. If word of this incident spread, Tongusa would be unable to hold his head high upon his return to the Mist. Not only would he be burdened with disgrace, but he might even be stripped of his title and the honor of belonging to the Seven Ninja Swordsmen.

Thus, he could only swallow the bitter pill of silent defeat, even instructing Kisame not to breathe a word about last night’s events.

Furthermore, when Tongusa saw Kisame send Tsunade flying with a headbutt, he was stunned, but his attitude shifted immediately. He no longer regarded Kisame as a mere lackey or subordinate, but as an equal, trying to draw him closer.

Unfortunately, Kisame was unmoved. By morning, his attitude toward Tongusa had grown cold. The day before, Kisame had followed Tongusa everywhere, calling him “boss” as if they were long-lost brothers. Now, he didn’t even bother to acknowledge him.

Having obtained the dull blade, Kisame no longer saw any value in Tongusa. Among adults, everything was a matter of mutual benefit; feelings were a luxury.

Tongusa, noticing Kisame’s change in demeanor, was both astonished and enraged. It felt as if he’d been pursued and discarded by a heartless lover.

Night deepened. The thousands of lights in the Hidden Leaf Village gradually went out as most villagers surrendered to sleep and dreams.

Click.

Kisame switched off the light in his room but didn’t go to bed. Instead, he slipped out the window, left the hotel, and moved silently along the shadows of the streets until he reached the Hidden Leaf Hospital.

He vaulted the wall, climbed the inpatient building, and peered through a fifth-floor window. There he saw Might Guy, still unconscious on the hospital bed.

It seemed he’d been a bit heavy-handed in the Forest of Death.

However, Guy’s breathing was steady—no real harm done. The coma was simply the result of exhausting too much chakra in too short a time.

Once Guy awakened, he would undergo a profound transformation.

Kisame had no particular designs on Might Guy; his interest was pure curiosity. He wanted to see just how far Guy could go with a helping hand from him.

If he had to describe it, Guy was both a friend Kisame acknowledged and a formidable opponent he had personally helped cultivate.

In the original story, the Eight Gates Guy, burning with life force, shone with brilliance for a fleeting instant—undoubtedly the strongest below the Sage of Six Paths.

Now, after consuming three Monster Cells, Guy might one day truly touch the realm of the Six Paths.

Even if only for a moment.

The Six Paths level—this too was Kisame’s goal.

Swoosh.

Kisame leapt down from the fifth floor, landing with perfect balance. After checking on Guy, he didn’t return to the hotel. Instead, he headed for a secluded corner and donned a hooded, wide black cloak.

He hadn’t forgotten the true reason for his visit to the Hidden Leaf for the Chunin Exams. Aside from following orders, he had his own objective: to gather intelligence.

Intelligence on ninja tools.

Now, Kisame had devoured five of the Seven Ninja Swords of the Mist. Only Samehada and the Flatfish remained. With Hozuki Mangetsu’s help, the Flatfish should soon be in his grasp upon returning to the village. Samehada would be more troublesome, but Kisame was determined to claim it as well.

Yet, the seven swords alone were far from satisfying his greed.

More. I want more!

Kisame raged inwardly.

Fortunately, the Hidden Leaf housed many famed ninja tools with unique powers.

In his earlier fight with Kakashi, Kisame had encountered the renowned White Fang Short Blade, once wielded by Sakumo Hatake. But as it turned out, it was merely an ordinary blade. Just as in the original tale, it was easily broken by the enemy in Kakashi’s hands.

Disappointed, Kisame began to seek new targets.

He knew that the Third Hokage possessed the Adamantine Staff—not only incredibly hard and heavy, but also capable of changing length at will. In truth, the staff was a transformed summoning beast named Enma, much like Samehada from the Mist—both were living weapons.

Kisame wondered if his cheat ability could consume living creatures.

The Second Hokage also had the Sword of Raijin, similar to the Thunder Sword from the Mist. In the original story, it was kept in the Hidden Leaf’s armory, forgotten over time, and eventually stolen by a random low-ranking ninja.

Additionally, the First Hokage possessed a massive greatsword, stored within the enormous scroll on his back. In the battle at the Valley of the End, he fought Madara Uchiha, who wielded the Flame Fan, to a standstill using this sword. But after his death, the sword’s whereabouts became unknown.

Kisame reasoned that, like the Flame Fan passed down in the Uchiha Clan, the Great Senju Sword was likely a clan heirloom—a divine weapon.

If anyone still knew the whereabouts of the Senju Greatsword, it could only be Tsunade.

But approaching Tsunade now was a sure way to get killed.

Finally, there was the Kusanagi Sword.

In the world of the Hokage, there were three Kusanagi swords: the Ame-no-Murakumo, the Ame-no-Habakiri, and the Totsuka Blade.

As a Kusanagi Sword enthusiast and collector, Orochimaru possessed the first two—one for himself, and one he later gave to Sasuke.

As for the elusive third, the Totsuka Blade, it was actually a spiritual sword with no physical form, wielded by Itachi Uchiha’s Susanoo.

If Kisame wanted a Kusanagi Sword, he’d have to find Orochimaru, pry open his mouth, and reach down his throat to pull one out—no easy task.

After all, at thirty-four years old, Orochimaru had yet to ruin his body with experiments and was at his peak, a prime candidate for the Fourth Hokage.

Upon consideration, Kisame realized that of all these ninja tools in the Hidden Leaf, the Sword of Raijin was the easiest to acquire.

Kisame hadn’t been idle these past days. While pretending to stroll about the village, he’d already scouted the armory’s location and defenses.

He waited until tonight for a simple reason: he’d be gone by morning. Even if the theft was discovered, the Hidden Leaf wouldn’t have time to react.

Tonight was the perfect opportunity.

He moved into action.

He didn’t use Transformation Jutsu to disguise himself. That technique was only effective in normal situations. In combat, the resulting chakra fluctuations would quickly expose him to any skilled shinobi.

Physical disguise was more reliable.

So Kisame donned his black cloak, becoming a shadowy figure flitting between buildings—like a batman in the Hidden Leaf.

He soon reached the armory with practiced ease.

The two Chunin guards at the entrance were slack, yawning sleepily.

Rather than show himself, Kisame activated the ability of his Stitched Needle index finger, firing a chakra thread from his fingertip. The thread snaked along the shadows at the wall, bypassing the guards’ line of sight.

He slipped silently into the armory.

Using the chakra thread’s sensing power, he began searching for the Sword of Raijin, planning to bind its hilt and extract it from the armory.

But an hour passed, and despite searching every corner with his chakra thread, he found no trace of the sword.

He had no choice but to stop.

Where had he gone wrong?

Kisame furrowed his brow, reviewing all the information in his mind.

If the Second Hokage’s sword wasn’t in the armory, it could only be in another, less-guarded place—the Senju Clan’s residence.

In the end, it came back to Tsunade.

Kisame was unwilling to leave empty-handed.

So even if it meant storming a dragon’s lair, he would take his chances tonight.