Chapter Forty-Two: All Confidence Lost

A captivating smile curved at the corners of her lips, and as Yu Youwei beamed, even the morning light seemed to pale in comparison. “Awake? Mo Fei, how are you feeling now?” Her voice softened unconsciously.

“It hurts. My whole body aches,” Ning Mofei replied pitifully, sniffling like a pampered pet begging for affection. If he’d had a tail, it would surely have wagged.

She took his long, still-trembling hand in hers, her smile deepening. “Pain is normal. The way your cold poison flared up yesterday nearly frightened me to death. That you could endure it—well, I truly admire you.”

Though his body still shook from pain, Ning Mofei’s pale face broke into a radiant smile. “It’s happened so many times now, I’m not afraid anymore.”

Looking at that bright, pure smile, Youwei’s heart skipped a beat. Some nameless feeling spread within her chest, but she forced herself to brush it aside and changed the subject. “Let’s go make some pills.”

“Pill refining isn’t any fun.” Born into a family of alchemists, Ning Mofei had never been required to learn the craft due to his limited intellect, but he’d seen enough to know what it entailed. Not wanting to get out of bed, he made an excuse. “I want to play ‘Monster Brawl’ instead.”

A blush flared on her cheeks. Youwei’s mischievous hand pinched his face twice in mock reproach. “Have you forgotten you promised to make pills for Third Brother? Even though he’s awake now, you can’t go back on your word.”

“But my whole body hurts!” His thin, bloodless lips pouted as he spoke with a hint of grievance. As if afraid she wouldn’t believe him, he grabbed her hand and slipped it under his clothes. “It hurts so much I can feel my flesh twitching.”

Her touch found his skin cold, yet the sensation was surprisingly pleasant. Though she was still a maiden, memories of reckless passion from another life stirred faintly within her. Hastily, she pulled back and scolded, “If your flesh is twitching from pain, how can you still want to play ‘Monster Brawl’?”

He blinked, his thick lashes casting alluring shadows across his face. Biting his lip, he whispered, “But when you hold me, Youwei, the pain disappears.”

She began to doubt whether she could ever truly let go without a backward glance, as if drifting away without leaving a single cloud behind.

Low-hanging gray clouds pressed over the land. Gnarled old trees stood bare and brooding by the roadside, their wrinkles masked by brown moss. A yellow leaf or two, like forlorn butterflies, drifted down from the blue-brick path by the Yin-Yang Pool, rising along an arc before fluttering down again.

No falling leaf could cross into the Yin-Yang Pool, yet Youwei and Ning Mofei strode down the unshaded blue-brick path unhindered, heading toward the alchemy chamber at the Rising Sun Pool. As they passed where the leaves danced and fell, invisible ripples of energy pushed the yellow leaves away.

When they reached the door of the Alchemy Chamber marked with the character for “Yellow,” Ning Mofei yawned repeatedly behind her. She glanced back with a smile, sunlight piercing the clouds to trace a radiant arc across her face.

“Youwei, you’re so pretty!” Ning Mofei blurted, dazed, as a yellow leaf landed with a soft smack on his forehead. He didn’t even brush it off.

“What a fool,” she teased, picking up the leaf. A sense of satisfaction welled up in her: At least this fool could appreciate her beauty! Ever since she’d saved him from a cold poison attack half a month ago, his eyes had only held her. He clung to her, willing to sit in the alchemy room all day just to bring her tea whenever she had a free moment.

“What pill are we making today?” Ning Mofei asked, trying to sound interested.

“The Foundation Pill, as always. I have little talent for alchemy, so I can’t aim too high,” Youwei sighed. It wasn’t humility—recent days of being berated by the little white bear had crushed her confidence. If not for her deep-seated pride, she’d have given up long ago.

“It took you three days to produce a single Foundation Pill. The pile of waste herbs could build you a grave!”

“What sort of useless master did Lord Bear end up with? Low-grade Foundation Pills, and after ten days, you can’t even make one that looks half normal!”

“Can you be any more hopeless? With your success rate, if you become an alchemist, you’ll lose Lord Bear’s entire fortune!”

“You call this a pill? Looks more like donkey dung! Lord Bear’s luck couldn’t be worse—adulthood is a distant dream!”

Before even lighting the furnace, those sharp-tongued criticisms of the little white bear echoed in her mind, making her want to abandon the attempt altogether. But if she really fled, that little cub would drown her in its spittle. Suppressing her irritation, she retrieved the “Comprehensive Guide to Alchemical Basics” and reviewed the steps from warming the furnace to tempering the pill before selecting ingredients for the Foundation Pill.

Flames from the earth-vein vent licked the dark beast-head furnace, which gleamed red. As the herbs were added, a fragrant scent spread through the air. Youwei watched the furnace with unwavering focus, not daring a moment’s distraction, sweat soon beading on her brow.

As the greenish liquid at the base of the furnace began to coalesce, the chamber door opened. Ning Mofei saw Uncle Jiu enter with several cousins and rushed forward to whisper, “Don’t disturb Youwei.”

Uncle Ning Jiu laughed. “She’s not making some high-grade pill—do you really need to be so superstitious?”

Just then, a loud bang came from the furnace and six beast-head vents spewed green smoke. Youwei looked over, mortified. “I’m too clumsy—ruined another batch.”

“You’ve only been learning for a few days; it’d be odd if you didn’t fail,” Uncle Jiu said, walking over and poking through the charred remains. Suddenly, he exclaimed, “There’s actually a finished pill?” The Ning family juniors crowded around as he retrieved a misshapen Foundation Pill from the ashes. Everyone fell silent.

“This pill is certainly ugly, Uncle Jiu—you don’t have to hold it up for all to see,” Youwei protested, embarrassed.

“For a first pill, this is quite good,” Uncle Jiu said, his eyes shining.

Thinking he was being sarcastic, Youwei muttered, “I know I have no talent. This is only my thirty-third pill, and it’s still so ugly. I’m just wasting herbs. You can be honest—I don’t mind.”

Uncle Jiu stared at her with a strange expression, as did the others. The atmosphere in the room turned odd, but the slow-witted Ning Mofei didn’t notice. Seeing his wife blush, he immediately shook his fist in warning. “Anyone dares criticize Youwei, I’ll hit them!”

Gripping his foolish nephew’s fist, Uncle Jiu said with a strange smile, “Anyone dares criticize Youwei, I’ll help you hit them. Niece-in-law, could you make another batch for us to witness?”

“So you can find your confidence at my expense?” Youwei replied, exasperated, before dragging Ning Mofei off to wander the streets.

The most prosperous part of Jiangning Prefecture was the alchemy trade, and pill shops lined every street. At the mere sight of pills, Youwei felt weary. After strolling through a couple of streets, she spotted the sign for “Heaven’s Source Auction House” and took Ning Mofei inside.