Chapter Fourteen: Hei Jue, I Was Just Fooling Around—Why Did You Reveal Your Own Secrets?

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In truth...
Kurozetsu should never experience emotions.
For Kurozetsu is the will born from Kaguya Ōtsutsuki, created solely to resurrect her and bring her back into this world.
Yet...
At this very moment...
Kurozetsu's feelings are unusually complex.
It is a mixture of sorrow and joy.
To describe Kurozetsu’s emotional turmoil as mere great sorrow or great joy would be an understatement.
Though Kurozetsu knew it had been deceiving Shirou Emiya all along, it was still deeply moved by him, especially when Shirou, even in failure, apologized to it—his comrade.
Perhaps...
This is what being regarded as a companion feels like?
Though Kurozetsu had always treated Shirou as a mere pawn and deceived him, it knew Shirou genuinely considered it a comrade.
The path to resurrecting Kaguya Ōtsutsuki was so solitary and long that Kurozetsu could find no companion; its deceit was repaid only with Shirou’s sincerity.
Shirou Emiya, an ancient man from a time when the Divine Tree and Kaguya were still revered, was a precious rarity in an age that had forgotten both.
Precious like...
A spark of fire.
In this long, harsh millennium of cold darkness, it was the only warmth Kurozetsu had ever felt; even a fleeting flicker of flame stirred its heart.
Shirou Emiya was also an extraordinary genius!
Yet now, he had become utterly despondent for having lost hope to resurrect Kaguya!
Such despair...
Should never have touched him.
The ancient Shirou Emiya was seemingly omnipotent, a mortal who stood shoulder to shoulder with gods, a genius who nearly changed the world, and single-handedly destroyed all remnants left by the Six Paths Sage!
And yet...
This once proud genius...
Now appeared utterly lost and broken.
Even in his despair, he still apologized to his comrade, Kurozetsu.
Because he believed he could not resurrect Kaguya, could not change the world, and had let Kurozetsu down.
If his mother, Kaguya, were to know of Shirou’s plight, the sentimental mother might shed tears for this pure and innocent man.
Of course.
Kurozetsu also felt a strange joy.
Because what caused Shirou’s deepest despair was, to Kurozetsu, a trivial matter easily solved!
“Do not despair over such small problems...”
A strange smile crept across Kurozetsu’s face as it hoarsely comforted Shirou, assuring him it could resolve these issues.
“The answer you seek...”
“Has always been by your side...”
But as these words left its lips...
Kurozetsu’s heart suddenly tightened with unease.
No, this isn’t right...
What nonsense am I spouting?
What am I doing here?

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I should be here to help the resurrected Shirou protect secrets in this era, not to leak more secrets to him!
Although Shirou is trustworthy, my identity must remain the most crucial secret. How could I blurt it out in a moment of emotional turmoil?
“...”
Shirou didn’t even give Kurozetsu a chance to react. Upon hearing this, he abruptly lifted his head, eyes wide with shock, staring at this comrade from over a thousand years ago in disbelief.
“Kurozetsu, could it be that you...”
“...”
Kurozetsu had no time to ponder.
It couldn’t even decide who it should pretend to be.
Inwardly cursing its own slip, it comforted itself that Shirou was trustworthy, and amidst this turmoil, it revealed its true identity.
“Indeed...”
“I am the will of Kaguya Ōtsutsuki.”
After stating its true identity, Kurozetsu’s spirit sank completely, mirroring Shirou’s earlier despair.
It had no choice but to trust Shirou.
Just as Shirou, in his despair, had no choice but to trust Ashura.
Even if regret came...
It was already too late.
Kurozetsu kept reassuring itself that it had already revealed too many secrets to Shirou, including its plan to resurrect Kaguya.
Its true identity...
Perhaps Shirou might someday guess it.
Or maybe Shirou’s human thinking would limit him from doing so.
But Shirou had already exposed his own desire to resurrect Kaguya, so revealing Kurozetsu’s true identity was not much different.
It didn’t matter...
Shirou was trustworthy!
Shirou must be trustworthy!
Kurozetsu regretted its impulsiveness but continued to soothe itself, for Shirou’s sincerity made further concealment unnecessary...
“No, wait...”
Shirou looked at Kurozetsu in disbelief, as though witnessing something impossible in this world!
No...
What are you doing?
I was just trying to lie casually to gain your trust...
And you go and expose everything about yourself!
Kurozetsu has lived for over a thousand years in this world, yet it still seems as naive as it was a millennium ago.
This is way too easy to fool!
Shirou recalled how, in ancient times, he had shouted about destroying the Shinobi clan, and Kurozetsu had echoed that, leading to the clan’s actual destruction once...
Shirou had only intended to manipulate Kurozetsu’s desire for revenge against the Six Paths Sage by shouting slogans to gain his trust, but Kurozetsu had truly been misled...
He had lied about worshipping the Divine Tree and used the matter of Kaguya to lure Kurozetsu, only for Kurozetsu to reveal his own desire to resurrect Kaguya and claim that chakra belonged to her...
And now...
After I’ve confided a few heartfelt words...
Kurozetsu has exposed his true identity.
It’s been over a thousand years!

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How is Kurozetsu still so easily deceived?
Shirou half-mocked Kurozetsu inwardly, yet also wondered if he had extracted too many secrets from him in the past, leading to this final unveiling...
Kurozetsu was too sincere...
Shirou almost felt embarrassed.
He could barely imagine how Kurozetsu would react when he eventually learned Shirou’s true nature...
In the future...
Probably not well.
For now...
Kurozetsu was still apologizing proactively.
“I truly am sorry...”
Unaware of Shirou’s thoughts, Kurozetsu even began explaining why it had concealed its identity all this time: “I have always hidden my true self...”
Yes.
Kurozetsu had to clarify.
It even needed to fabricate a story.
After all, it could not reveal the full truth of the rift between Kaguya Ōtsutsuki and the Six Paths Sage; it could only weave tales favorable to Kaguya, since Shirou was a thoroughly kind-hearted man...
“No, wait...”
Shirou found Kurozetsu’s apology a bit overwhelming.
He worried that accepting the apology now might be excessive and could cause Kurozetsu’s mindset to shift in strange ways.
Still...
Shirou realized a troubling matter.
As someone who had always been sincere since ancient times, he would not be able to immediately forgive Kurozetsu for hiding his true identity, even if Kurozetsu was the will of the goddess he believed in...
To forgive Kurozetsu outright...
To accept Kurozetsu’s identity immediately...
Might arouse Kurozetsu’s suspicion.
He should appear confused and conflicted for a while.
At least pretend to be unable to bear the shock of Kurozetsu’s revelation, waiting for Kurozetsu to plead for forgiveness...
Only then...
Would Kurozetsu trust him more.
Because people trust what they have to work hard to obtain, not what is simply handed to them.
Human interaction is truly complicated.
Sometimes handling relationships well is no easy task.
“Wait a moment...”
Shirou weakly waved his hand at Kurozetsu, seemingly struck deeply in spirit.
“Kurozetsu...”
A weary sadness crossed Shirou’s face, as if unable to accept that his old comrade had deceived him and concealed such an astonishing truth.
“This is... unexpected...”
“Anyway... let me think on this alone for a while...”